3 Reasons Why You’re Not Manifesting Your Dreams

You want advice on manifesting your dreams, and although you’ve read every book out there on the law of attraction, you still can’t quite seem to get this whole manifesting thing down. Here’s the secret: You need to stop reading about what to do in order to manifest that partner, that job, or that fancy car, and instead, you need to identify and release the blocks that are keeping you from manifesting. There are 3 common blocks, and unless you’re willing to look at them and be honest with yourself, you’re never going to get out of your own way enough to create a life that you love.

#1 Your soul doesn’t want it; your ego does.

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You think you want a new job. You think you’re ready to meet your soulmate. You think you want to manifest a house with a white picket fence. And why wouldn’t you? We’re part of a culture that sells a single narrative: You’re supposed to meet your partner at a young age, get married, have kids, buy a beautiful house. This is the dream the world sells, and you think it’s what you want, so you’ve made vision boards and have read books in order to manifest each component of this dream.

However, you’re not ready for your soulmate. If you were to meet that person today, you’d royally fuck it up. You’ll be ready in four years, after you’ve done your inner-work. Also, you don’t really want that new job. It requires so many more hours at the office, that it’s just going to stress you out. Further, you’re not ready to buy that house right now. Once you have a mortgage, you’ll be chained to your current city of residence, and when an opportunity arises for you to relocate, you won’t be in a position to accept it. You think you want the soulmate, the job, and the house (and maybe you do), but you haven’t surrendered to divine will. You have soul contracts to fulfill, people to meet, and lessons to learn. When you come up with a plan that’s not in alignment with your soul, it doesn’t manifest. 

What am I saying? You’ve been focused on getting a job with more money, when your soul wants you to finish that screenplay. You’ve been spending all of your time dating, when your soul is begging you to sit down to meditate and heal childhood trauma. You want the house and the car, when your soul wants to teach you about detachment. You’re so focused on manifesting $50,000, when your soul is asking you to learn how to love yourself. Your inner-critic is mean to you: You think you’re fat, unattractive, and you doubt your ability to step into your authentic power. 

You feel crummy about yourself, but instead of tending to this crumminess, you spend your time focused on manifesting money, because your ego believes that if you have enough money, you’ll be happy. Your ego is wrong.

You’re not manifesting because you’re trying to manifest from ego, not from your soul. In order to co-create and attract people, situations, and things into your life, you need to surrender to what your soul wants. Your soul wants you to buy a course on self-love, or work with a coach, but your ego wants to focus on manifesting a fancier apartment, or exotic trips. Be willing to sit in silence and ask your spirit what you really want. Be willing to start your day with a meditation practice. Be willing to let go of everything you think you want and surrender to what you really want. Be brave enough to ask yourself: What does my soul really want?

#2 You’re pushing too hard.

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You’re motived, and you’re a hard worker. You spend every moment working towards your dreams, and because you’re disciplined, you can push beyond your limits. You believe that you’re going to make it happen, and you’ve come up with a story. You’re going to move to that city, get that job, and marry someone who fits those qualifications. You’ve created a narrative in your mind, and your mind has convinced you that you can achieve it. Your mind has told you that if only you send out enough resumes, go on enough dates, or practice your craft long enough, it’ll all work out.

Yes, on one hand, you do need to take action (inspired action, not action steps that were born out of your ego), however, if you’re desperately seeking something, your desire for it is what’s actually keeping it away. Huh? What? What do I mean? 

Let me break it down for you:

1.If you want something, you are telling the Universe that you don’t currently have it, and so, you’re not a vibrational match to that thing (or person manifesting). For example, if you’re single, and you want a partner because you feel lonely (and all of your friends are coupled off), then your vibration resonates with being single, not with having a partner. If you really want to manifest a partner, you have to shift your vibration from being lonely, or seeking something external, to feeling the fullness of love in the current moment. You have to feel such an overwhelming amount of love, so much so that you’re bursting with gratitude, that the Universe will bring you more love, more love, and more love? Why? Because you resonate with having love, not wanting love.

and also…

2.If you’re seeking something external to make you happy, the Universe will not give it to you, or, it will give it to you, but you’ll soon learn that it won’t actually make you happy. For example, how many people want to manifest fame and money, only to find out that when they become famous, they’re even more unhappy; they overdose on drugs, or they kill themselves. You see articles of them in the newspaper about how their self-destructing; they need to go to rehab; they need to find themselves again. Why? You’d figure they’d be happy: All of their dreams came true! Nope. The dreams their ego invented came true. They thought if they had more money, they’d feel fulfilled, but, when they became a millionaire, they felt, well, exactly the same. 

So, what does that mean for you? You’re not going to be happy when you get the job, or if you meet the partner, or when you lose thirty pounds. You’re going to be just as happy as you are now, and this is an important lesson that the Universe wants you to learn, so be willing to learn it. Be willing to be happy without all of the things the world tells you you need before you can experience any joy. 

#3 You’re unhappy.

There’s no way to sugar-coat this, so I’m just going to come right out with it: You’re kind of a bummer. You complain, and you’re negative. You find flaws with your partner. You’re mean to your mom. You overeat and then you beat yourself up. You gossip. You spend lots of time on the couch, watching television and eating in order to numb yourself. When was the last time you were really happy? When was the last time your body felt loose, flexible, and light? When was the last time you weren’t stressed or focusing on a future moment, and instead, you sat, present, appreciating the sun on your skin? Has it been a while? Have you gotten caught up in the business of everyday life - creating plans and then complaining when you actually have to show up? When was the last time you laughed so hard, your belly hurt.

You’re not as happy as you could be if you were just willing to let go, loosen up, and have fun. You’d manifest more if you’d learn to play a little, dance more, and spend time meditating, releasing resistance in your body, and chilling out. But here’s the key: You can’t chill out for the purpose of manifesting; that’s still an egoic desire. Chill out because it feels good. This is the way to raise your vibration and manifest; learn to shift your energy so that it resonates with lightness, fun, and ease, much like the energy of a playful child. From this energy, you will attract opportunities, divine connections, and synchronicities into your life. You’ll be an energetic match to people who are also light, easy, and in alignment. You’ll open up to the flow of Life itself; rather than going upstream, you’ll let life lead you where it wants.

So, if you’ve tried the vision boards, the visualizing, and the books on manifesting, but you’re still stuck, then don’t do anything else. Instead, identify what you need to stop doing. Ask yourself: What am I doing that’s blocking this manifestation? And be willing to let go of the dream of the person, job, or fill-in-the-blank if it’s actually not what your soul wants for you, because what’s in alignment with your spirit will far surpass any narrative of a perfect life that your ego could conjure up. Be wiling to surrender your will to God, have fun, and lighten up.

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Hi, I’m Jessie! I’ve been on the spiritual path for 15 years, and this blog is where I share hacks, lessons I’ve learned & mindful dating advice. I believe you can be spiritual and a badass. I believe you can live boldly, pursue your passions, & love fully. If you’d like to work with me, send me a message.