Find a Romantic Partner Who Will Balance Your Masculine/Feminine Energy.


I was in the middle of a conversation with a woman at a bar, when I blurted out (if not a bit rudely) that she had an incredibly masculine energy, which was probably why she kept attracting men who were more effeminate. This seemed to startle her (not my bluntness), but rather, that she tipped on the side of masculinity, seeming as how she was a very beautiful and her appearance was traditionally feminine; she had long hair, and she work a silk camisole, heels, and lots of eyeliner. 

When most people think of masculine/feminine energy, they think of external characteristics, such as fashion choices, or hairstyles, but that's not what makes up someone's energy. Masculine energy is more assertive; it's a take-charge energy. From masculine energy, we make decisions, exhibit strength, and take action. Think about the energy that initiates the first kiss, or the energy of the person leading on the dance floor. Whereas feminine energy is more receptive, less confrontational; it's easier and goes with the flow. Feminine energy is just as strong, but its strength comes from its flexibility, grace, and ability to surrender. Feminine energy nurtures, loves, and feels gentle. 

Neither energy is better than the other, and every person has some percentage of both masculine and feminine energy. The key to finding a romantic partner is to understand that the dynamic of your relationship will depend on what energy we bring to the table. 

Here are some common ways that women present a more masculine energy when dating:

  • needing to make every decision (where to eat, what to cook, which show to watch)
  • not being receptive to a man when he's offering assistance (to help with carrying something, fixing something, etc.), and instead, insisting that she can do it on her own
  • always needing to be right and insisting that her partner see things her way (never being the one to apologize first is a clear indicator of this)
  • always being the initiator (calling, asking the other person out, or trying to push the relationship forward)
  • not willing to exhibit emotions 
  • being guarded in her behavior (afraid to be vulnerable/let someone in)

Here are some common ways that men present a more feminine energy:

  • being too afraid to initiate physical interaction, or hesitating to move the relationship forward
  • apologizing needlessly for things that don't merit an apology
  • not making decisions (where to eat, what to do)
  • doing whatever it takes to appease the woman regardless of his own desires (he agrees to watch a romantic comedy and attend a flea market every weekend)
  • being unclear about what he wants with regards to the relationship (wish-washy behavior)
  • being very soft (even a bit meek) when speaking
  • expressing lots of emotions

Again, none of these characteristics are good or bad, and both genders have masculine and feminine energies. There's only one thing to consider when talking about masculine/feminine energy in the dating world, and that is balance.

A female who is more masculine will either attract a feminine man, or will elicit feminine aspects from whomever she is dating (even a man who is fairly balanced with regard to his energy will lean more feminine when a woman exhibits masculine energy).

A more feminine man will attract a masculine woman, or will elicit masculine aspects from whomever he is dating (and just as above, even a woman who is fairly feminine will present a more masculine version of herself when sitting across from a man who presents a more feminine energy).

This is true in heterosexual relationships, as well as homosexual; a more feminine man will attract a more masculine man and vice versa. 

So, when we are looking for a romantic partner, we have to consider the energy that we are bringing to the table. If we are a dominating, assertive woman expecting a man to present as an alpha male, it's not going to happen (unless she meets someone who is even more masculine than her, thus, eliciting a more feminine response). 

We attract partners and elicit from them the exact opposite of what we offer, so it would serve us to be mindful of what energy we're presenting, as our romantic lives are mirrors of our own energy, and the more conscious and aware we are of what we're presenting, the better chance we have of finding the perfect partner who will match our energy and offer the chance to be in a harmonious and loving relationship.