How Close Are You to Manifesting Love?

You might be on the verge of finding love, meaning, it’s possible that you’ve done the inner-work, released your blocks to love, and you’re ripe to manifest a relationship any minute now. How can you tell if you’re on the brink of attracting your soul mate, or, if you have more inner-work and mindset shifts to make before you’re ready to manifest a healthy relationship?

For the purpose of simplicity, let’s use a distance analogy. Your distance to manifesting love most likely falls into one of three categories: 1)You’re a 5-minute walk away, 2)You can drive there in less than three hours, or 3)You’re going to need some more frequent flyer miles.

Here’s a breakdown of each category:

You’re a 5-minute walk away.


You’re so close to finding love, that any minute now, you’re going to meet your perfect match. There are three telltale signs that will let you know if you’re on the verge of finding love.

Sign #1: You tend to meet kind, positive men who are open to the idea of being in a relationship. If you’re a stone’s throw away from love, you attract sane, happy men. It doesn’t matter if there’s a romantic connection or not, what matters is that you’re attracting men who are boyfriend material (they might wind up being someone else’s boyfriend, mind you, but that’s so not the point). The point is that you’re not attracting jerks, playboys, or the sort of men who would lie and act shady. If you’re attracting quality men, but you just haven’t found a romantic connection, hold tight, because you’re so close you should start making room for a partner’s toiletries in your bathroom cupboard.

Sign #2: You’re happy with your life. You’re happy when you think about being in a relationship, and you’re happy when you think about being single. You’re happy regardless of what happens! When you don’t need a relationship to fill an empty hole, that’s when you’re ready to manifest one. If you’re desperate or lonely, you’re not going to manifest love; you’re going to manifest men who are desperate and lonely. This is law of attraction 101.

Sign #3: You’ve done the inner-work. You’ve forgiven those who’ve hurt you in the past: ex-partners, people from your childhood, etc. You’ve read a fair amount of spiritual or personal growth books. You meditate. You’ve recognized blocks you’ve had to love and have worked on releasing them. You’ve opened your heart. You’ve admitted where you’re wrong. You’ve learned how to take radical responsibility for your life. You’re absolutely ready to manifest love. If you’ve committed to a mindfulness or spiritual practice and you’ve manifested a life of peace and joy, you’ve lifted your vibration enough to be a match for love. 

You can drive there in less than three hours.

To keep with the distance analogy, you’re halfway there. You might not be on the verge of meeting your soulmate, but you’re far past the point of attracting crazy men who have commitment issues, or think that ghosting is a perfectly acceptable means of letting someone know they’re not interested. 

So, how do you know if you’re within driving distance of a relationship? There are 3 telltale signs:

Sign #1: You attract a wide variety of men. You go on dates with sane, positive men, but you also go on dates with lunatics. You meet men who are successful, but you also fall for unemployed men who live in their grandmother’s basement. You attract spiritual men, as well as atheists, and you like them just the same. You’re neither here nor there; in fact, you’re everywhere, and so while you might not attract the same tragic pool of men as someone who’s far from being in alignment with a relationship, your dating life does seem more hit or miss.

Sign #2: You’re aware of blocks or unhealed trauma. You had a hard childhood. You got out of a long-term relationship or marriage that felt like the Devil sucked your soul right out of you with a straw. You experience moments of presence, but you are aware that there are people you still need to forgive and trauma that needs to be healed. Here’s the good news: You’re conscious of it. Whereas some people are in denial about the resentments and pain they carry, you understand that you’re on a spiritual path, and while you are progressing in terms of self-love and healing, you still have some distance to travel. 

Sign #3: You’re still deciding what you really want. Do you want a spiritual partner, or a partner? Do you want children? Do you want to continue to live in the current city you reside in for the next five years? What are you willing to compromise on? You have an idea, but it fluctuates depending on your current date. You meet a sharply-dressed attorney with dimples, and all of a sudden, your desire for a spiritual man is out the window.

You’re still in the process of refining your wants, and oftentimes, this happens unconsciously. You think you want to stay in the city, but give it five years, and you’ll be singing a different tune. You think you want three kids, but you don’t really understand what it takes to be a parent, and you’ll change your mind in time. If this is the case, it would serve you to continue dating and having experiences with men to help you zero in on what you really want. 

You’re going to need some more frequent flyer miles.


You think you want a relationship, but the truth is that it would serve you do some inner-work and commit to a spiritual or mindfulness practice before entering into a relationship. Why? You attract partners based on your level of consciousness and ability to receive love. If you keep manifesting jerks, partners who are emotionally reticent, dishonest, or who engage in constant drama, then that’s a reflection of your consciousness. 

There are only two reasons as to why you keep attracting crazy men, or men who don’t want a relationship. 

Let’s look at the first reason.

Reason #1: You possess the same trait you dislike in them.

Any trait you dislike in another is a reflection of some part of your personality. It’s easy to want to keep ourselves separate from others: He’s a lunatic, but not me! My last eight dates were negative and dishonest, but not me! 

Here’s the truth: If you’re continuously attracting men who exhibit the same traits, then it’s because you possess those very traits.

So, if that’s the case, you need to commit to doing some work on yourself.

  • What parts of your personality are you not willing to see?

  • Which negative patterns would it serve you to release?

  • Where are you in denial?

  • What attitudes, beliefs, or mindsets can you release in order to manifest a partner who is more positive, emotionally healthy, and loving?

This is what you need to ask yourself and reflect on before you will be ready to manifest a relationship.

Reason #2: You have unconscious fears that are causing you manifest men who can’t love you.

You can look to your dates as indicators as to where you are and what blocks you may still need to release.

For example, if the last six men you dated were emotionally reticent and afraid of entering into a relationship, then they’re mirroring your own unconscious fears about commitment. If you have a tendency of attracting men who complain and are negative, then they’re mirroring back a part of your personality that is negative and likes to complain.

Here’s the key: You can use your date to figure out what lessons you need to learn and which blocks you need to release. Any problem you attribute to your date is a direct reflection of your consciousness, so whatever you don’t like about the people you’re dating needs to first be changed in you

Wherever you on the path to love is perfect.It’s about the journey, not the destination. That being said, it can be helpful to recognize where you are on your journey for the purpose of helping you to see the next step you can take. There’s no right or wrong place to be, because we are all moving closer to love while releasing our blocks and limiting beliefs. This is why we’re here, to wake up to the fact that we do not need to seek for love; we are love.



Hi, I’m Jessie! I’ve been on the spiritual path for 15 years, and this blog is where I share hacks, lessons I’ve learned & mindful dating advice. I believe you can be spiritual and a badass. I believe you can live boldly, pursue your passions, & love fully. If you’d like to work with me, send me a message.